That title sounds like some kind of horror B movie, but anyway. Ubisoft have finally fessed up to why Assassin's Creed is always late on the PC. Speaking with our colleagues at Polygon, Jean-Sebastien Decant assures us it has nothing to do with DRM, it's simply that they develop for one platform first, then move on to others.

And that is the largest pile of horseshit I've heard all year.

First of all, if you develop for one platform at a time, how come it's only the PC release that has been delayed? At least, until this year when it will, supposedly, launch at the same time as the PlayStation 4 and Xbox One. Oh yes, and about that, isn't the PC supposed to be your lead platform now? So shouldn't everyone else be getting it later?

Pro tip, if you want to improve your relationship with PC gamers, stop fucking lying to us. We know it's because of your bullshit DRM. We've always known this. Feeding us some cock and bull story about different platforms, just how stupid do you think we are?

However, in happier news, and on the subject of Assassin's Creed. There's a new, rather intriuging Ubiblog regarding the challeneges of making games both historically accurate, and still fun. Touching on things like the, ahem, colourful way in which pirates approached fighting. In real combat, they say, there is only one goal. To win. Given the nonesense above, it seems awful apt. Because see, you may be winning, since you make games we still buy despite your...shenanigans. But we will not go down quietly.